October is my birthday month. Each October, I feel a little different from the previous one although I cannot pin point exactly what it is. Perhaps I am a year older and maybe I have seen a bit more. Although we are all getting older, I don’t actually feel old, or older in that sense. Age is just a number. It doesn’t mean much to me, except when people started addressing me as signora rather than signorina!
Birthday month always makes me pause and reflect upon the previous year – How have I lived? What have I changed? At the age of 42, I can say that I have done one big circle.
I believe that we are born at where we need to be with our own inno-essence (innocence+essence). As we grow, we are channeled and funneled through different parts in the society in order to pick up lessons and tools to equip us to go back to our starting point.
Since I was a child, I always felt that I needed to do something in my life and I was looking and searching for that meaning for a very long time. And now, I feel that I have found that meaning.
Some people may call it a life calling but life calling sounds like a big term to me. The process itself in finding the meaning may be big in terms of how long it has taken and how much it has entailed. Everything else feels rather natural and right although I wouldn’t say it has been an easy journey.
Life calling can indeed be to swap our high flying power suit and heels to an orange robe and sandals, from living large and glamorously to going off grid, from focusing on making a large sum of money for a company to working for a charity with no pay. It is all of that and much more.
These days, there are more of us looking for the meaning of lives, wanting to get more out of our lives. Less becomes more. Simplicity over complexity. People are quitting their normal jobs to start something anew. Being calm, happy and content with having less in the new lives even when there are mountains of challenges and uncertainties ahead is becoming the new normal. When we have friends who have crossed that road, we wonder how they did it and then we wonder how we can do it, too.
Before we think about crossing that road, we need to examine though if it is the life calling that we truly want or the peace and calmness that we see in our friends that we want. Life calling is not so much about making drastic changes in life. It is about being in tune with who we are and what we are. It has been perceived as a sudden and drastic event in life only because many of us have been living lives mindlessly, and often are not aligned to who we are. When we find the alignment, the change required to make the cross over is often the opposite of where we are hence the perception of being drastic.
Peace and calmness is a by-product when we are aligned and connected with ourselves. It presents itself naturally and cannot be sought after. It exists when there is stillness. The moment we start looking for it, we are no longer still.
Life calling is like a gift. It can come in different sizes and packages. Life calling is not necessarily about changing something for another thing or leaving a place for somewhere else. Sometime, it is about changing something for nothing and leaving a place for nowhere.
On the odd days when we feel overwhelmed, we feel the need to take a walk in the nature, that’s a calling. In the odd evenings when we feel tired and we just want to stay in and have a quiet evening ourselves, that’s a calling. In the odd periods where we feel the body needs a break from something, be it off booze, caffeine or whatever it may be, that’s a calling.
Friends who no longer serve us, jobs that make us toxicated, habits that pull us back, relationships that drain us to no end… A new interest that inspires us, a new place we like spending time in, an urge to do something differently… They are all callings from life.
Be open to your callings as they exist in all sorts of shapes and forms. Recently, I went to a kirtan circle by Kevin James Carroll (fabulous songs if you have yet to hear them). There was a lady sitting opposite me, on the other side of the mandala that was laid on the floor. During the 2 hour singing session, a voice in my head kept saying “go talk to her, go talk to her”. I kept replying “I don’t know her and talk about what?”. I didn’t get any reply on what to talk about after the 2 hours but I did go and talk to her.
I walked up to her and said “excuse me if I come across a bit strange but a voice in my head kept telling me to come to talk to you for the last 2 hours. I don’t know why and I don’t know what I need to talk to you about. Here are my contact details (passing her a contact card). Please take a look at my website when you have time. If it means anything to you, please get in touch. If it doesn’t, I am sorry I have wasted your time.”
The following day, I received an email from her saying that she would attend my upcoming talk.
When we listen, we are able to answer. When we answer, we become connected. When we are connected, we become peaceful and calm. When we are peaceful and calm, we are able to listen more. It is a beautiful cycle.
Life is calling us daily – are you listening and answering yours?