Every one has a passion, at least that’s what I think. In these modern days of ours, our passion doesn’t always seem to have the space to make its presence known. We are too busy doing things, things don’t necessarily relate to our passion.
I, too, found myself falling into that trap. A trap that I somehow magically created myself. I was trying to be a good wife, then a good mum, then a good mum again whilst we keep moving from one place to another. I never knew being pregnant and looking after people would take up so much time, effort and energy. All that small tasks here and there often leave me exhausted.
Perhaps I used to be a loner, and still am one by nature. Having people around me almost 24/7 is not really my cup of tea, and having to plan the daily menu and the household stuff isn’t exactly my calling either! Anyhow, I can’t complain and I am not complaining. We have the help we need at home and I can go off a few hours whenever I need a breather.
Whilst it’s fun searching for gluten free vegan recipes for my daughter’s school snacks, making home made granola instead of buying those addictive loaded boxes from the supermarkets, bulk shopping nuts and seeds for home made cookies, I can only do so much of that and it numbs my brain after awhile.
I am a mother but I am just not that motherly; I am a wife but I am just not that wifey either! No judging here, I am merely stating the fact.
What makes my life so unfulfilled, if not miserable in the last few years, is not what I am doing; it’s what I am NOT doing. I realized that I have been putting everyone’s else well being on the front burner, leaving mine at the back. I have been too busy being a mum, a wife and everything else but me – a modern day syndrome of women perhaps? Or is it just me? No one to blame except me but then again I am not into the finger pointing culture.
Although we only moved back to Singapore for the arrival of our 2nd child and that we didn’t have a solid plan in terms of what and where was next, suddenly, it daunted on me that it’s in fact the perfect time that I do something for myself, something that I am passionate about.
I always have a passion to teach and I am passionate about teaching. I have taught people how to think and I have taught people how to feel. I always know that I am meant to be doing something meaningful and I have been waiting for a long time to get a better idea of exactly what it is. Co-incidence or not, the long waited knowing finally gave me a glimpse of its face when I now have the space and the experience needed. Talking about the flow in life, eh?! It has been as much a journey of happiness, self discovery and transformation and a journey of agony, self confrontation and destruction.
In order for me to teach what I need to teach, I have to go through it all myself. Or else, it won’t be authentic, and I won’t be able to empathize either. There is no 101 on this. We can all share and learn from each other but that personal touch, together with the personal experience, makes all the difference. It’s time that I re-ignite myself and feel passionate about my passion again.
I have a role to play in the women’s community. With everything that I have learned and gained, it puts me in a good position to help other women by sharing my experience. We, women, have too many roles to play these days, and the definitions of them are not often defined by us. We lose ourselves in the daily life, leaving our genuine and authentic selves behind. Eventually, it becomes a habit and we forget who we really are other than the one we think we are.
I am offering mentoring and coaching services to women, and women only. I am here to assist and guide women to find themselves in the world that we live in and the flow in their own lives. A (female!) friend of mine is helping me put a few things together for the website currently. It will be a slow progress as we are figuring it all out. Whilst I intend to make my passion my life as well as a living, I am also working on doing some voluntary work. I have had the luck in having help from other people along the way when needed, and I feel that by extending myself to where is in need, when appropriate, will only further enhance the passion for my passion in life!